When she’s not in the mood…part 2

In the last post, I talked about the “primal panic” that happens when you feel rejected, alone, and that your partner is not available to you (when she says no to sex, he won’t connect emotionally, etc.).  That panic is actually a cry for connection…I so badly want to connect, but I feel that you Read More

Why he gets so upset when you’re not in the mood…

In the book Hold Me Tight, Dr. Sue Johnson uses the term “primal panic”  to describe what happens to us when we feel like we are losing connection with our loved ones.  For example, if he initiates sex or physical closeness with you and you’re not in the mood.  Or if you want to talk after Read More

Fighting with your spouse: healthy or not?

John Gottman, therapist, author and leading expert on marriages, says what distinguishes the happiest couples from the rest is not the ability to avoid fights, but the ability to repair after the fight. So rather than focusing on avoiding conflict, I think it makes sense to look at what is underneath the conflict. Oftentimes, couples Read More

Do we need counseling?

5 signs you may need to go to a marriage counselor: 1- You feel like roommates or co-parents. It is way too easy to fall into this rut if you aren’t actively investing in your marriage. It can feel a bit like Groundhog’s Day sometimes…come home from work, tag team with chores, chauffeur kids around, Read More